Monday, June 27, 2011

Role Reversal

Almost 3 weeks ago JoAnn had surgery on her foot. It was out-patient surgery and the stitches were removed in two weeks, but she has to walk flat-footed for 6 weeks. The first few days she spent on her back and after the first week she sat up more and has become increasingly more mobile. Suzanne was here for the first 5 days and that was incredibly helpful.

After Suzanne left I was pretty much responsible for keeping things going. I don't need any snide comments girls! The first morning after Suzanne left I did the dishes, cleaned the kitchen counter, put stuff away, got clothes going in the washer and drier, and tried to get everything as clean as JoAnn does. After about 2 hours I was beginning to understand why she doesn't get started on projects until about 2 pm. Since then, I've gotten better and quicker, and JoAnn has been more mobile and also helped out. Today I even vacuumed the floors and while I've done that occasionally, I'm like Whisper, when I hear her open the door to the vacuum closet I run and hide.

There have been some behavior patterns I really wasn't ready for. Last Thursday as we got up from lunch she walked over to the recliner and sat down. I looked down at the remains of lunch on the table and realized that I had just experienced a role reversal. I do try to help out in the kitchen and we do more and more together in the kitchen, but I suspect I'm AWOL pretty frequently. Now I know how JoAnn feels after preparing dinner, setting the table, and then being left to clean the table and kitchen. I also thought this was a 1 time role reversal experience, but it's becoming a habit. Not all the time, but more frequently. I think there might be a little payback involved here and I probably deserve it (once again, no comments girls).

I'm just anxious for JoAnn to make a full recovery - and she is doing very well - so we can reverse our roles once again, but with behavior change on my part. I have felt over the last several years that I was doing my part, but I realize now I wasn't, at least not enough. All those old rationalizations pretty much have to be thrown out with yesterday's garbage. They aren't even recyclable.

5 comments:

Krissie said...

You are doing a great job dad but that's the great thing about marriage. You are always continually learning and now you know ways to make mom's life a little bit easier! I know I love it when David helps me clean up after dinner or vice versa when he grills.

sally said...

Oh you make me laugh pretty darn hard. I died when Mom got up from lunch & went to the couch. I do that from time to time and nobody cleans up. So I'm learning. Thanks for taking care of Mom.

Donna said...

No comment from this girl!

Glad you're learning what it's like being a Mom, just be thankful there isn't a bunch of little ones running around and making messes too. They make lots bigger messes than Mom makes!

Student Entrepreneur said...

love you!! you are a great help!!

quilts and quirks said...

Sorry, I had to dry the laugh tears from my cheeks. You had me laughing so hard. You know, I think there is a little "pay back" involved, but I won't tell anyone. Thank you honey for all you've done around the house these last weeks. I can't wait till this foot heals all the way.